How I Became a Famous Novelist by Steve Hely

GOALS AS A NOVELIST:

1. FAME--Realistic amount. Enough to open new avenues of sexual opportunity. Personal assistant to read my mail, grocery shop, and so on.
2. FINANCIAL COMFORT--Never have a job again. Retire. Spend rest of life lying around, pursuing hobbies (boating? skeet shooting?).
3. STATELY HOME BY OCEAN (OR SCENIC LAKE)--Spacious library, bay windows, wet bar. HD TV, discreetly placed. Comfortable couch.
4. HUMILIATE POLLY AT HER WEDDING.

-How I Became a Famous Novelist

As always, I have a formidable stack of unread books sitting on my shelf--a bit of an obligation, but mostly a comfort, since not having a book to read is a none-too-secret terror of mine. Thus I had no reason to pick up How I Became a Famous Novelist at St. Vincent de Paul a few months back, except I thought that I would regret it if I didn't.

How I Became a Famous Novelist is the story of Pete Tarslaw, a twenty-something living in Boston and working as a professional polisher of school admission essays. He's--and I don't think there's a way to put this nicely--a loser. When he gets an invitation to his ex-girlfriend's wedding, though, it spurs him to action. Not for any particularly selfless reason: he just wants to win the breakup.

He hits upon his plan of action while watching a soft news piece on folksy novelist Preston Brooks. He quickly sizes up the man, who never met a platitude he didn't like, as a con artist--and decides there's no reason that he can't write a book like that. No point in trying to make it good, mind. He creates a list of what elements he would need to include to make his story popular, and dreams of the fame and fortune to follow.

To his credit, he does write a book. A terrible book, from all the evidence provided, but nonetheless a book with a beginning, middle, and end. (As a NaNoWriMo participant, I realize just that is an accomplishment). How I Became a Famous Novelist then charts Pete's new career, with its highs and--more often--its lows. It's a funny ride, particularly when author Steve Hely pokes fun at the modern book scene. (His imagined titles and plots for New York Times bestsellers were amusingly believable.) While Pete himself is not particularly likeable, he's self-aware enough that the reader doesn't tire of his company, and I found the book overall to be pretty enjoyable.

Up next: The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making by Catherynne M. Valente. (Whew, that's a mouthful.)

The Flavia de Luce Series by Alan Bradley

Sanctified cyanide
Super-quick arsenic
Higgledy-piggledy
Into the soup.
Put out the mourning lamps
Call for the coffin clamps
Teach them to trifle with
Flavia de Luce!

-The Weed That Strings the Hangman's Bag 

I had intended to write one entry for each book of the Flavia de Luce series--there are five so far--but it didn't work out quite like that. I love these books, so much so that it was impossible to stop after just one and record my thoughts. I went from one book right to the next with virtually no interruption, so eventually it seemed better to just tackle the series in one post, as my thoughts about the different plots would be bound to get a bit muddled. Here goes.

Flavia de Luce is a girl of nearly eleven living with her family in the small English town of Bishop's Lacey in 1950. She is an unusual child--fiercely smart, with a particular love for chemistry, and no real interest in maintaining the sort of propriety that a girl of age at that time would be expected to do. She runs wild through the village, accompanied only by her bicycle, Gladys, which formerly belonged to her long-lost mother.

Flavia's mother, Harriet, casts a long shadow over her life, though Flavia herself has no memory of her. Harriet left on a mountaineering expedition when Flavia was just one, never to return. Flavia's father retreated from the world after his wife's disappearance, seeking refuge in his collection of postage stamps. Her sisters, Ophelia and Daphne (or, as Flavia calls them, Feely and Daffy), torture Flavia with their accounts of her supposed early life, telling her she was a changeling, for example, or that she made Harriet miserable.

It's no wonder, then, that Flavia is so independent. And perhaps it should be no surprise that when she stumbles upon a dying man in her garden in the first book of the series, The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie, she's far from terrified. In fact, she's fascinated, and sets about to solve the mystery of his death.

She's a dab hand at it too, and over the course of the series, she acquires quite a reputation for being involved whenever the game is afoot.  Flavia combines her keen sense of hearing--inherited from her mother--with her knowledge of chemistry and her sheer moxie to get to the bottom of things. It is nothing short of a delight to read along as she puzzles out each case.

I am absolutely in awe of Alan Bradley, who has such a sure hand in guiding this series. The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie was his first novel, and he created such a beautiful character in Flavia as well as such a fully realized world in Bishop's Lacey. Even if there were no mysteries, I think I would enjoy following Flavia as she rode around on Gladys and visited Denwyn Richardson or Miss Cool, or the Puddock sisters. The clever mysteries--never overly convoluted, which seems like an absolute rarity in the genre at this point--do make it all the sweeter, though.

The most recent book in the series, Speaking from Among the Bones, ends with a bit of a cliffhanger. I will be waiting most impatiently, I must admit, until I can next return to Bishop's Lacey and follow the further adventures of Flavia, her family, and the rest of the village.

Up next: How I Became A Famous Novelist by Steve Hely

PS: While looking for an image for this post, I stumbled upon this promotional video for the series: http://vimeo.com/12758978. It makes me even more excited for the eventual adaptation. (Good luck to whoever has to cast Flavia!)